It’s Cool

It’s okay to be silent
You don’t always have to talk
Only talk when it means something
You can’t control how other people feel
You’re not rude for taking care of yourself
Find peace within yourself
Learn to enjoy just being
Enjoy the silence, the clarity

if you don’t want to talk, don’t talk.

You are in control.

That’s What it’s Like

Imagine ghosts haunting you day and night
and you’re the only one that can see them
They can touch you
but you can’t touch them, and
The only way to move them away
is to be okay with seeing ghosts

That’s what mental illness is like.

Wednesday Night in London

I love the smell of a cold, rainy night
so brittle, the air freezes in my nostrils
It’s sobering in a way
with my lamp on and I, with my head poking out my window
a great time to smoke
But I quit last week
The music of the raindrops will suffice
The moisture turns the estate into wetlands
I can smell the earth three stories high
It’s consoling in a way
With my record playing and I, sitting here writing this poem.

Run away into my future-self’s arms

middle men in devil comstumes could never take what we had
sown together at the atriums, the string only loosened
We thought it broke apart at the seams, tearing like flesh
Turns out we didn't give each other enough space to move.

internal catastrophe

To those now lost:

The love was always there,
the hate was just stronger.

The fear was even worse.

Poetry booklet: Smoke Alarm


Depression cat

the curtains put me to sleep.
The room darkens.
I ease,
I drift my head down --
It's all becoming dream.
The weariness is intoxicating.
Must it feel so good, yet so wrong?
I'm put to bed by demons --
I purr, snoring.
Tears freeze in my eyes.
Heavy heart of stone, shattered eyes of glass.
I can finally see
that I'm a fraud.
I lay to rest, it's all I can do.
Close my eyes --
End the pain, End today.

A butterfly in a caterpillar’s body

My heart bleeds too
I may not cry
but I hurt
I seek adventure --
A call for meaning
A chance for awakening
An urge for retribution
I want to see the sun 
lensed through different skies
Dance on the edge of the earth
I'm no robot
I'm a human being
I need to be free
I need to be me.

Automated discolouration

I hate the outside world so much

all it does
is make me
feel like shit
Pointing out
my inadequacies
Causing me
to compare
Remind me
that I'm broke
Tell me too 
much info
about "news"
and futile
opinions --

I don't care.
Turn the music up.

I just want
to forget
it all
It infuriates
me, the

The memes are cool though.

But I'm much
more happier
Just living
my life
Cleaning my
Having fun
and watching

Lord of the flies

I break under the weight of a thousand oceans
God's tears are heavier than they seem
My bones are broken by crushing waves
I choke on the salt
Laid castaway on the shore
The sun cooking me
Seagull food, beach rats
Roasting to a crisp
My skin shrivels and darkens
I'm almost ready
Got no fight left
Can't move
To those who are hungry,
The lighthouse serves.